I think I dreamt that because I helped this drunk guy, earlier on that evening, and I guess I felt like an angel in a way. My mind was silent and had some kindness in it. You ever helped someone, or really listened to someone, and your own mind has gone silent? It's like you disappear and they become the centre of the universe instead. That's where peace is, when you really receive the universe, or whatever's happening in the present moment, you really receive it, let it in, really agreeing to this moment, feeling yes, okay, come on in, you can enter and share whatever I have, you can have my time and my attention, the door of my heart is open to you, come on in, this is fine, this is okay, I don't need to change this, this moment is the only moment, this is reality right now, I am actually alive right now, I am here, I exist in this very moment. You get the idea. ;D
I also dreamt that someone I know died, and I was really heart-broken. I was surprised, because I didn't realize how much that person meant to me. Dreams are good like that, they show us our deepest feelings; the ones that get suppressed under our conditioning when we're awake.
Do you know you are alive?
Most people forget. They get caught up in the 'contents' of life, that they miss life itself. They don't notice they are alive. When you're caught up in the contents, things can get very ordinary, but the moment you realize you are alive, then everything is very special and mysterious. This is a personal experience I've had once in a blue moon, over some years. It's not connected to Buddhism, or any philosophy, it's just something that has happened to me. Once, I was out in the woods, and all of a sudden, I realized I was alive. And my mind was silent, and I experienced a feeling of bliss. Everything snapped back into a greater perspective. Things that seemed so important, were now just the temporary contents of life, and paled in importance compared to the sheer reality that I was here, right now; that I even existed at all. Anything else was absolutely fucking meaningless.
It is such a mystery and a miracle that we even exist. It is so beautiful. I am. I exist. There is existence. There is life, happening now. I have hands, look at them move, look at them blur before my eyes. I have skin, look at it, feel it. I'm here now, talking. I can hear things, sounds. This moment is so unbelievably full. There is this huge sense of unknowing. The intellectual mind cannot begin to comprehend the sheer reality of simple being, existing. The cogs can't turn. There are no answers, there is just here, now. There is just this. There is just everything, this moment. There are no answers, but there are no questions. You can try to question, but you have to let it go.
DO IT NOW!!! LOOK AT YOURSELF!! LOOK AT YOUR ARMS, FEEL THEM! FEEL YOUR BODY!! LISTEN, LOOK, TASTE... REALLY LOOK AT IT!! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?? YOU'RE HERE, YOU'RE ALIVE, YOU EXIST.... FUCKING LOOK AT IT!! DROP EVERYTHING NOW, AND FUCKING LOOK!!! YOU ARE ALIVE ... YOU EXIST RIGHT NOW YOU ARE HERE
If you don't realize your existence then you're living in a fucking dream world. If you don't understand what I'm talking about, then you're living in a fucking dream world.
This is a mantra for you: I'm here.
Frog asked Master Toad, "what is the ultimate truth, can you explain it to me?" Master Toad got up and smacked Frog upside the head. Feeling the sting, Frog noticed his existence. Master Toad then said, "good, you understand. Even an idiot can get this. True or false, ultimate or shitty, here it is, you can't deny it!"
Frog asked Master Toad, "what is reality?" Master Toad looked up at the trees, blowing in the wind. Seeing this, Frog noticed that reality was happening now. Master Toad then said, "what is reality? What a stupid question! There it is - it is that! If you say it is anything, you are just making it whatever you say it is!" The word, the concept, is not the thing. The thing is right there! What's your problem?"
Frog asked Master Toad, "who am I?" Master Toad picked up a bucket of freezing water, and poured it over Frog's head. The cool air hit the water, and Frog remembered he was alive. "That's all you need," said Master Toad, "if I tell you, you are this, or you tell me, you are that, that is all bullshit! Definitions are not insights into things, they are attachments we clip onto reality. As soon as you start talking, you've fucking lost it! It's right in your face, you fool! Stop reading about it!"
More frogs came and sat down, and Master Toad continued his teaching. "A frog's thoughts can never know reality. Reality is in one dimension, and a frog's thoughts are in whole fucking other dimension. It's like putting photographs together, trying to make a sound. Don't be an idiot! A frog's thoughts are the running commentary to reality. Who can watch a film, while the commentary is running? If we're at the cinema, and our friend is sat next to us, giving us a commentary, we wanna staple his mouth shut.
Thinking doesn't get you there. Thinking is the whole problem! Right now, this is it. Shut up and live with it!" Then Master Toad got up, and went for a walk.